Philippians

These are my cousins Gracie and Carly from Oregon that I saw on my way to the school here... I just remembered that I had this picture and I love it so I figured I would share it. Aren't they gorgeous!

Timeless Truth = 3:8 All things are worthless compared to knowing Christ

This is a truth that God has been bringing to the forefront of my mind continually over the last few years… as he has been breaking me of the things I try to find life in. I see in my life that I look to many things for peace and rest and joy and God has been ever faithful in not only breaking my heart over them but also in showing me that all things other than Christ are truly lacking. The thing I have seen so evident is exactly what Paul saw in Christ… that to know him and be in relationship with him was truly life and rest and peace and joy and the only thing that makes me feel alive. Yeah, I have realized that looking to the approval of men brings no peace, there is no hope in it. My pride would bind me and lead me to find no value in myself. Seeking acceptance in women is a fleeting notion, for the reality is that they neither can bring forth a lasting and pure security in my life nor can physical affection bring the life my soul truly desires. Being a perfectionist there is a part of me that feels alive when I am excelling but the counterpart of worthlessness in failure proves to be too utterly destructive. Money and materialism brings momentary joy but the truth is that they are just temporary means of fulfillment. Christ has shown himself in all these things to be the true desire of my soul. Even the blessings that these finite things are in my life fail to compare to the reality of peace and rest that Christ provides throughout the day as I simply wrestle with him in relationship. Yeah, the times at night where I find myself just being honest and open and speaking to Christ personally is when I feel his presence and see the life he has for me. The moments where I feel alive are when I see the truth of his mercy over me, when I get to praise him for who he is and what he has done for me, when I get to cry out for him to reveal himself to me and to others. Standing on the reality of who he is, fixed on desiring to know him more and more is truly better than life, than all the things of the earth.

The problem is that every moment of every day where I lose sight of Christ I find myself wanting to return again to the things of the world to bring forth life to me. I realized a few years ago that I would press in to Christ, not doubting him, not fearing him, and choosing to run to him for everything I desire, need, and don’t understand. Now I see that this not enough… for I must run to him for all things, everything. The reality of his being life to me must translate into all aspects of life. Yeah, I just want more Jesus… which is weird to say because it sounds so cliché but in my heart it reigns so true. I see my sin, I see the cares of this world, I see my contentment with things less extraordinary than Christ and my heart breaks. Christ has proven himself to be so faithful in my life, and I am encouraged to see that it is God’s purpose that I would know him more. He has shown himself to be faithful to my cries for grace, breaking me of the things I once valued that I would desire more of him. I will rest in his hands to sanctify me further, crying out that he would break me of my pride and trusting that he will continue this work in me as he said he would. Yeah, I am thankful for what he has done… and do so deeply desire to be made more thankful. Yeah, I am excited to see where he will take me deeper… trusting and submitting to his desire in my life. Yeah, so here I am saying that I want more of him… want to see this truth more clearly for I believe that all things are worthless compared to knowing Christ. Lord, help me with my unbelief.